Wednesday, May 19, 2004

Displacement Activity

My friend is still in hospital and despite hopes this morning that she might get discharged later in the day, it eventually transpires that she will have to stay in a least one more night.

I feel so useless and so far away. I may be able to take Friday off to go down if that would help, but it would mean cancelling meetings and I have no spare leave...

Instead I divert my anxiety into trying to do anything, absolutely anything to make things better for take away any stress I can. Can I find a way to sort her car out so she doesn't have to worry about how it will get "home" if she can't drive? Is there anyone I can contact for her? Is there a way we can get some bits she needs to her? What can I do to take other stresses off her?

Fortunately, another mutual friend is in the loop and so the anxieties are shared. She is also somewhat nearer the hospital (only 2 hours away!) and being an utter angel, manages to get down there in the evening to take our friend some items and spend some time with her.

I speak to "the patient" later and I can tell the visit has worked. I hope this shard of peace carries her through the night.

In between phone calls once I get home, I do some Greenbelt work, but my heart isn't in it and as I finally get around to making a phone call that is long overdue, I know I'm waffling, unable to focus and be coherent about what is needed and how we might best approach things. I'm on auto-pilot. Whatever gets you through the night.

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